Friday, January 29, 2010

Mindful Thrift - and - A Free Book Giveaway!!!

There was a time when I was the queen of Neiman Marcus. Back in the day when I worked on Wall Street, I went to Neiman Marcus twice a year, Fall and Spring, to buy my business suits for the season. I bought five suits with matching blouses and spent what now seems like a ridiculous amount of money.

My priorities and circumstances have changed a great deal since then, (not least of which is that one of my life goals is never to wear a business suit again in my life). Back then my cosmetics were from Chanel and changed with the seasons. Now, make-up is less of a concern as I work from home. But these purchases also reflect the self-absorbed consumerism that drove my spending habits. I developed pet spending projects that became obsessions. When I took a trip overseas, one of the highlights was buying an Hermes scarf on the plane ride home. But then, if I had one scarf, wouldn't two be even better? And then there was my Steiff period in the mid-nineties, when I became an ardent collector of Steiff teddy bears.  If I bought the Steiff Collectors Club edition for the year, shouldn't I also by the next special edition that came out for the holidays?

Luckily, over the years, my  money habits have changed along with my consumer desires. I've come to appreciate the pleasures of saving and investing rather than spending. I have learned how investing even a small sum every month, also known as dollar cost averaging when investing in the stock market, can add up to a nice sum over the years. I've come to appreciate the satisfaction that these small measures can bring over the momentary pleasure of retail therapy.

Which is not to say that I've stopped shopping, but I've learned to shop for bargains. For instance, in Evergreen our only big box store is a Wal-Mart. There I found a $7 black puffy jacket in the mens' department that worked perfectly when the temps dropped, in fact, I bought two extras for my brother and his wife for their visit in March. We also have a terrific thrift store that is run by volunteers from local churches and which uses 100 percent of their revenue to fund a local charity for people in need. There I've purchased a lambswool Ralph Lauren sweater for $8, with the store tags still attached. I got a gently used Le Creuset dutch oven for $4. I'm happy to report that I have donated more than I have purchased, which not only helps me to keep my closets filled only with clothes I actually wear, but also provides a nice tax deduction for charitable contributions. But my favorite part of every thrift store visit is serendipitously finding a book I've been thinking of or had on my list at amazon, there among the thrift store shelves for $2 for hardbacks and $1 for paperbacks. This magic trick has been so consistent with each visit that I now look forward to sitting in one of the comfortable wing-back chairs in front of the shelves and waiting for the book du jour to appear before my eyes. 

Admittedly this focus on thrift has become sharpened in the past few months since I have been without a job. However, rather than feeling deprived, I feel grateful that my needs are being met in an abundant, yet affordable way. (When I arrived here woefully without pants that were suitable for the cold weather rather than the Florida warmth I'd left, I was lucky to find and buy four pairs of corduroy pants for an average cost of $6 per pair over the course of a few trips to the thrift store. Not only were they wonderfully priced, they happen to be made of the finest corduroy I've ever felt.)

This thrifty mind-set actually became the impetus to help a local business owner with the suggestion for a new product offering for his soup and sandwich shop. When he included two thick slices of homemade bread with our take-out order for soup, I brought the slices home and turned them into rustic croutons which I then took back to his store and told him that he could use the butt ends of the loaf that he would normally discard to create croutons to sell with the soup as an additional source of revenue for the store.

My evolution toward thrift by choice (and by need) has taught me a lot about how I want to spend my money, why it matters that I become more mindful, not just when I am not working but more importantly once I am working again. I realize that another context of this mindfulness is an acceptance that I am older, am single, and need to secure my financial future. But it is also a realization that there is a certain freedom that comes when you accept responsibility for choosing where you spend your money and what you choose to have in your life as a result. For instance, those Hermes scarves are no longer a great priority (though admittedly I treasure the ones I have), but travel will remain a luxury worth saving for. And lest you think I've joined the monks in a cave in the side of the mountain, I do still enjoy a nice bottle of wine, but I've learned that I have to choose where to spend my money. I still have a long way to go before I find approval in the  eyes of Suze Orman, but I am now living with fiscal eyes wide open.



BOOK GIVEAWAY: This morning I finished reading what is now one of my favorite books of all time. And ironically, it is a book that I found last week at, you guessed it, the thrift store! The book is: DON'T LET'S GO TO THE DOGS TONIGHT: An African Childhood by Alexandra Fuller. When I picked it up and read the back cover it dawned on me that I'd first heard of this book a few years ago when it was reviewed in Oprah's O magazine. At the time it resonated with me because Ms. Fuller now lives outside of Jackson, Wyoming, one of my favorite places on earth. However this tells the story of her remarkable, hard-scrabble childhood in Africa. The back copy reads in part:

From 1972 to 1990, Alexandra Fuller grew up on several farms in the remotest regions of Africa. Three of her siblings died in childhood-only she and her sister Vanessa survived. While their father was away for long stretches fighting on the side of the white government in the Rhodesian civil war, their mother managed the farming work with a fierceness and passion fueled by a love of life, and an almost illogical love for Africa....A worthy heir to Isak Dinesen and Beryl Markham, Alexandra Fuller writes with brilliance, humor, and overwhelming affection for her African childhood.

In honor of the magic of thrift store finds, I'd like to give away this wonderful book. The copy is an ARC paperback. All you have to do is leave a comment below. I'll randomly choose a winner next Wednesday!

29 January 2010

Today they announced healthy GDP numbers showing a 5.7% growth in the 4th quarter, quickly discounted by news commentators as an indication of inventory replenishment rather than a necessary predictor of job growth. This news seemed to be reflected by the job notice emails in my inbox. There were fewer than usual and I found that in more than one instance, when I clicked on the hyper-link, I was informed that I'd already applied to the job. That was a bit frustrating because I wanted to make more progress in the job hunt and feel that each day not moving forward is a day wasted. So today became a day of housekeeping, going through papers that had accumulated on my desk, writing, and other mundane but necessary tasks that keep our lives in order.

There are a couple jobs that I have (previously) applied to that I seem to be still under consideration for, which if I were given the opportunity, would really enjoy. At the same time, there continues to be in the back of my mind a desire to figure out a career that would enable me to be self-employed. I don't know what that is, or if I am qualified, but it is there (a gently nagging voice) in the back of my mind.

29 January 2010

Today they announced healthy GDP numbers showing a 5.7% growth in the 4th quarter, quickly discounted by news commentators as an indication of inventory replenishment rather than a necessary predictor of job growth. This news seemed to be reflected by the job notice emails in my inbox. There were fewer than usual and I found that in more than one instance, when I clicked on the hyper-link for the job, I was informed that I'd already applied to the job. That was a bit frustrating because I wanted to make more progress in the job hunt and feel that each day not moving forward is a day wasted. So today became a day of housekeeping, going through papers that had accumulated on my desk, writing, and other mundane but necessary tasks that keep our lives in order.

There are a couple jobs that I have (previously) applied to that I seem to be still under consideration for, which if I were given the opportunity, would really enjoy. At the same time, there continues to be in the back of my mind a desire to figure out a career that would enable me to be self-employed. I don't know what that is, or if I am qualified, but it is there (a gently nagging voice) in the back of my mind.

29 January 2010

Today they announced healthy GDP numbers showing a 5.7% growth in the 4th quarter, quickly discounted by news commentators as an indication of inventory replenishment rather than a necessary predictor of job growth. This news seemed to be reflected by the job notice emails in my inbox. There were fewer than usual and I found that in more than one instance, when I clicked on the hyper-link for the job, I was informed that I'd already applied to the job. That was a bit frustrating because I wanted to make more progress in the job hunt and feel that each day not moving forward is a day wasted. So today became a day of housekeeping, going through papers that had accumulated on my desk, writing, and other mundane but necessary tasks that keep our lives in order.

There are a couple jobs that I have (previously) applied to that I seem to be still under consideration for, which if I were given the opportunity, would really enjoy. At the same time, there continues to be in the back of my mind a desire to figure out a career that would enable me to be self-employed. I don't know what that is, or if I am qualified, but it is there (a gently nagging voice) in the back of my mind.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

28 January 2010 aka God is My Headhunter

Last night the President said that for all the success stories he'd heard about how the economy was turning around he also knew of people who 'sent out resumes every day and got no response'. At that moment I thought he was speaking of me. Before I moved to Evergreen, I truly imagined that as soon as I started sending out resumes in December, I'd have a job. I thought for sure I'd be starting my new career in January. I'd visualized the job I wanted, 'getting the call', even going to work, or better yet, working from my computer at home.

The reality has been quite different. It is now quickly closing on the end of January and I have not received one positive response to the resumes I've sent out, the jobs I've applied to, the online job boards I've joined. What I have received are daily emails from resume writing services, resume distribution services, services that promise to put my resume in the hands of recruiters, or to help me write a cover letter that will land job offers with just 'one magic line' that apparently the other thousands applying for the same job are missing.

The worst thing about the job hunt is the toll is takes on my self-esteem. I have an MBA that I earned with a 3.9 GPA. I've been an Assistant Vice President for a Japanese Investment Bank, I've taught overseas, and worked in Commercial Real Estate, and yet, day after day I wonder if at 47 I am too old to be hired for the jobs I've applied to, or if the diversity of my work background is actually working against me. This morning I woke up at 5am. This is what happens when I've got a lot on mind, I wake hours early and then the flood of worrying thoughts begin. I try to counter them with positive thoughts or prayer, and if that doesn't work, I turn on the morning news and let the white noise cover the chatter in my head.

Last night, my evening devotional read 'let go and let God' and I'm trying to do that. I also got up this morning and applied for more jobs and posted my resume to more job sites. Let's see who produces results first, me or God...

28 January 2010

Last night the President said that for all the success stories he'd heard about how the economy was turning around he also knew of people who 'sent out resumes every day and got no response'. At that moment I thought he was speaking of me. Before I moved to Evergreen, I truly imagined that as soon as I started sending out resumes in December, I'd have a job. I thought for sure I'd be starting my new career in January. I'd visualized the job I wanted, 'getting the call', even going to work, or better yet, working from my computer at home.

The reality has been quite different. It is now quickly closing on the end of January and I have not received one positive response to the resumes I've sent out, the jobs I've applied to, the online job boards I've joined. What I have received are daily emails from resume writing services, resume distribution services, services that promise to put my resume in the hands of recruiters, or to help me write a cover letter that will land job offers with just 'one magic line' that apparently the other thousands applying for the same job are missing.

The worst thing about the job hunt is the toll is takes on my self-esteem. I have an MBA that I earned with a 3.9 GPA. I've been an Assistant Vice President for a Japanese Investment Bank, I've taught overseas, and worked in Commercial Real Estate, and yet, day after day I wonder if at 47 I am too old to be hired for the jobs I've applied to, or if the diversity of my work background is actually working against me. This morning I woke up at 5am. This is what happens when I've got a lot on mind, I wake hours early and then the flood of worrying thoughts begin. I try to counter them with positive thoughts or prayer, and if that doesn't work, I turn on the morning news and let the white noise cover the chatter in my head.

Last night, my evening devotional read 'let go and let God' and I'm trying to do that. I also got up this morning and applied for more jobs and posted my resume to more job sites. Let's see who produces results first, me or God...

28 January 2010

Last night the President said that for all the success stories he'd heard about how the economy was turning around he also knew of people who 'sent out resumes every day and got no response'. At that moment I thought he was speaking of me. Before I moved to Evergreen, I truly imagined that as soon as I started sending out resumes in December, I'd have a job. I thought for sure I'd be starting my new career in January. I'd visualized the job I wanted, 'getting the call', even going to work, or better yet, working from my computer at home.

The reality has been quite different. It is now quickly closing on the end of January and I have not received one positive response to the resumes I've sent out, the jobs I've applied to, the online job boards I've joined. What I have received are daily emails from resume writing services, resume distribution services, services that promise to put my resume in the hands of recruiters, or to help me write a cover letter that will land job offers with just 'one magic line' that apparently the other thousands applying for the same job are missing.

The worst thing about the job hunt is the toll is takes on my self-esteem. I have an MBA that I earned with a 3.9 GPA. I've been an Assistant Vice President for a Japanese Investment Bank, I've taught overseas, and worked in Commercial Real Estate, and yet, day after day I wonder if at 47 I am too old to be hired for the jobs I've applied to, or if the diversity of my work background is actually working against me. This morning I woke up at 5am. This is what happens when I've got a lot on mind, I wake hours early and then the flood of worrying thoughts begin. I try to counter them with positive thoughts or prayer, and if that doesn't work, I turn on the morning news and let the white noise cover the chatter in my head.

Last night, my evening devotional read 'let go and let God' and I'm trying to do that. I also got up this morning and applied for more jobs and posted my resume to more job sites. Let's see who produces results first, me or God...

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

26 January 2010

I missed Every Day Do On Thing, I missed the single-minded purpose of that blog and felt that it has become an important log of the move and career journey that I started last year. So I am going to continue posting there about my career creation and then bring the posts over to here as well so you don't have to jump back and forth. By the way, I'm also working on a new post for this blog on....well, you'll see tomorrow.

Today I applied for two jobs with an online learning company that creates curriculum for homeschooling parents and kids. The job is curriculum writing and reviewing which is actually something I done in the past when I was teaching overseas. I would love this job. It would enable me to write, to work on educational subjects, and I would be able to do it remotely, which is one of my primary desires.

This past weekend and then again this afternoon, I spent time reading one or two of the career guidance and exploration books I recently picked up: The Purpose of Your Life, and the more career specific The Pathfinder: How to Choose or Change Your Career for a Lifetime of Satisfaction and Success. There are times when I actually feel guilty taking time from my day to work my way through the exercises in the book. However, for the majority of my working life, I have chosen jobs because they were expedient, because they were available, would provide a reliable paycheck or because they were the type of job that I thought I should take. I have had some great experiences as a result but I have yet to find the job that is in synch with my passions, that makes me say "this is what I was meant to do with my life". And that is what I want most now....I have felt this way for years but this is the first time that I have taken the time to really pursue the journey in a step by step way.

What makes the journey difficult and makes me second guess myself is the nagging fear of time slipping away or my six month lease being up before I have a job, of the need for a source of income which often makes me think I should simply go for the reliable paycheck instead of the grander vision....because what if I choose wrong or fail?

On the other hand, how do I keep that fear from paralyzing me into either inaction, not taking the chance to try for the job I really want or a starting a business on my own, or choosing a convenient job rather than one that I will really love? Even writing about this has been difficult because I hate to admit my own fears and weakness. One of the greatest questions I have is: I admire entrepreneurs so much, and would love to own my own business, and yet I've never tried, I completely doubt my ability....I say to myself, 'oh, you don't have the personality for entrepreneurship'. Is that a correct assessment or how do I get around that fear and move forward?

Only my determination to take action each day will make a difference. Which is one reason that I am making time to work through those books and think about the decisions I make as well as taking real  action steps each day.

26 January 2010

I missed Every Day Do On Thing, I missed the single-minded purpose of this blog and felt that it has become an important log of the move and career journey that I started last year. So I am going to continue posting here and then bring the posts over to my other blog as well.

Today I applied for two jobs with an online learning company that creates curriculum for homeschooling parents and kids. The job is curriculum writing and reviewing which is actually something I done in the past when I was teaching overseas. I would love this job. It would enable me to write, to work on educational subjects, and I would be able to do it remotely, which is one of my primary desires.

This past weekend and then again this afternoon, I spent time reading one or two of the career guidance and exploration books I recently picked up: The Purpose of Your Life, and the more career specific The Pathfinder: How to Choose or Change Your Career for a Lifetime of Satisfaction and Success. There are times when I actually feel guilty taking time from my day to work my way through the exercises in the book. However, for the majority of my working life, I have chosen jobs because they were expedient, because they were available, would provide a reliable paycheck or because they were the type of job that I thought I should. I have had some great experiences as a result but I have yet to find the job that is in synch with my passions, that makes me say "this is what I was meant to do with my life". And that is what I want most now....I have felt this way for years but this is the first time that I have taken the time to really pursue the journey in a step by step way.

What makes the journey difficult and makes me second guess myself is the nagging fear of time slipping away or my six month lease being up before I have a job, of the need for a source of income which often makes me think I should simply go for the reliable paycheck instead of the grander vision....because what if I choose wrong or fail? On the other hand, how do I keep that fear from paralyzing me into either inaction, not taking the chance to try for the job I really want or a starting a business on my own, or choosing a convenient job rather than one that I will really love? Even writing about this has been difficult because I hate to admit my own fears and weakness. One of the greatest questions I have is: I admire entrepreneurs so much, and would love to own my own business, and yet I've never tried, I completely doubt my ability....I say to myself, 'oh, you don't have the personality for entrepreneurship'. Is that a correct assessment or how do I get around that fear and move forward?

Only my determination to take action each day will make a difference. Which is one reason that I am making time to work through those books and think about the decisions I make as well as taking real  action steps each day.

26 January 2010

I missed Every Day Do On Thing, I missed the single-minded purpose of this blog and felt that it has become an important log of the move and career journey that I started last year. So I am going to continue posting here and then bring the posts over to my other blog as well.

Today I applied for two jobs with an online learning company that creates curriculum for homeschooling parents and kids. The job is curriculum writing and reviewing which is actually something I done in the past when I was teaching overseas. I would love this job. It would enable me to write, to work on educational subjects, and I would be able to do it remotely, which is one of my primary desires.

This past weekend and then again this afternoon, I spent time reading one or two of the career guidance and exploration books I recently picked up: The Purpose of Your Life, and the more career specific The Pathfinder: How to Choose or Change Your Career for a Lifetime of Satisfaction and Success. There are times when I actually feel guilty taking time from my day to work my way through the exercises in the book. However, for the majority of my working life, I have chosen jobs because they were expedient, because they were available, would provide a reliable paycheck or because they were the type of job that I thought I should. I have had some great experiences as a result but I have yet to find the job that is in synch with my passions, that makes me say "this is what I was meant to do with my life". And that is what I want most now....I have felt this way for years but this is the first time that I have taken the time to really pursue the journey in a step by step way.

What makes the journey difficult and makes me second guess myself is the nagging fear of time slipping away or my six month lease being up before I have a job, of the need for a source of income which often makes me think I should simply go for the reliable paycheck instead of the grander vision....because what if I choose wrong or fail? On the other hand, how do I keep that fear from paralyzing me into either inaction, not taking the chance to try for the job I really want or a starting a business on my own, or choosing a convenient job rather than one that I will really love? Even writing about this has been difficult because I hate to admit my own fears and weakness. One of the greatest questions I have is: I admire entrepreneurs so much, and would love to own my own business, and yet I've never tried, I completely doubt my ability....I say to myself, 'oh, you don't have the personality for entrepreneurship'. Is that a correct assessment or how do I get around that fear and move forward?

Only my determination to take action each day will make a difference. Which is one reason that I am making time to work through those books and think about the decisions I make as well as taking real  action steps each day.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Can I Get My Kindle with a Deckle Edge Feature?


"The lady doth protest too much, methinks." - William Shakespeare (Hamlet)



Yes, yes, I know....I'm writing another rant about the Kindle? Geez, why don't I  buy one already or just shut my pie hole?!


Because I don't have that much self-restraint.



This afternoon I went to amazon.com to order a copy of Richard Russo's Empire Falls after reading mention of it in Donald Maas' Writing the Breakout Novel Workbook. Maas used a short excerpt from the book to illustrate how to create a character's inner conflict. And I was blown away by the beauty of Russo's writing, which sent me scurrying to amazon to buy my own copy of Empire Falls.

There I was confronted with the choice between a hard cover edition with deckle edge pages and the paperback. While I LOVE deckle edge pages, love the feel of them, somehow they feel more ''book-y", I ultimately chose the paperback version by Vintage Contemporaries because the cover art just spoke to me. But that simple decision brought to mind one of the pleasures of reading 'real' books compared to e-readers. Reading is an incredibly tactile experience, which engages not only our mind but also our eyes, our touch, even the smell of the ink and paper can add to the experience. 

Considering the amount of time I spend at my computer each day, I doubt that I would qualify as a neo-Luddite. For the most part, however, I believe that I would miss the tactile pleasure of reading too much to switch from the paper page to the electronic back-lit display. On the other hand, if I ever go on another two week cruise, there's an excellent chance that an e-reader of some sort will be packed in my carry on luggage. And if Apple comes out with a full color multi-media platform (google: 'Apple Tablet') that also serves as an e-reader, it would be revolutionary for college students who could now get their textbooks downloaded in minutes with full-color illustrations...wonder why this beats Kindle? Imagine you are a medical school student in an anatomy class....color coded illustrations are pretty important.

So I see the e-reader as a temporary solution for avid readers and students rather than something one would adopt on a permanent basis. Or am I wrong? I would love to hear from anyone who has switched to an e-reader for everyday reading. I am very interested in how long-term users feel about their reading experience. Do they now use the e-readers exclusively? Do they switch back and forth between the traditional and new technologies?


Am I like the wealthy German merchant, who when confronted with the 'new' Gutenberg  Bible replied: "But I could never give up my illuminated manuscripts?"


Yet, e-readers are a game changing technology for the publishing industry. And for that reason, I am incredibly fascinated with e-readers from a business model perspective. I feel as if I am watching history when I read the almost daily articles that discuss how e-books and e-readers will change the publishing industry. Beyond, simply which company will bring out the best platform, there are fascinating questions about intellectual property: what is a book,? does it consist only of the content between its covers, or is it a stand-alone product, like a vacuum cleaner? Now that e-readers have turned that model on its head, who owns the rights to the book?

Which is why I was fascinated by these paragraphs from a recent article in Publishers Marketplace, regarding the interesting new developments that are being negotiated ahead of what is widely anticipated to be Apple's foray into the e-reader, media platform business:

Though initially resistant to a new paradigm, by multiple accounts Apple has agreed in principal to do business with publishers under what is called the agency model--as opposed to the wholesaling model currently in place for ebook sales and most physical book sales. In the agency model, the publisher is considered as keeping possession of the actual goods (the ebook files) and it pays a commission to its authorized selling partners. So the publisher sets the retail price of the ebooks, and the commissioned agents have no ability to change that price. Ebooks sold under the agency model would be offered to any established trading partners who agree to the commission and other particulars.

Given that publishers, agents and even retailers have already skirmished over whether ebook sales are a traditional sale or a license, and given the completely different nature of selling access to a digital file versus a physical object, there's plenty of room to argue that a new selling model is only logical and overdue.

While some consumers might resist publishers' pricing under this model, it is a way of offering ebook owners access to new high-profile releases simultaneous with hardcover release. And regaining pricing control over the biggest books that sustain publishers, authors and retailers alike. It could also lead back, at least for a period of time, to a differentiated marketplace--where different ebooks cost different amounts, and to the extent that publishers experiment with enhanced or extended ebooks also offer different kinds of material--as opposed to the commodity marketplace now in place that suggests all new books and bestsellers are likely to cost the same thing.

Under a certain logic, such a new system of selling would actually expand the network of retailers selling ebooks since losing money on top titles would no longer be a pre-requisite to doing business. At the same time, publishers hope, it would provide readers broad access to new titles in ebook form while not undercutting physical bookstores as they struggle to survive. But it would interrupt the implicit bargain that has driven ebook device sales--invest in an ereader, and get cheaper books.


--Publisher's Marketplace, January 19th, 2010


There are a couple points in this article that I find fascinating: first the idea that what is being sold is not a physical object with a transfer of ownership coming through the sale of one unit (book), as with a standard book sale, which the owner of the book can then give away or re-sell without consequence, but instead a limited license that allows the transfer of the content of the book only without transfer or future sales rights.

Does this new model help or hurt the author in terms of payment for sales, will it result in more units sold and thus higher revenues, or because the units are sold at a lower price, will it be a wash? Or will this open the floodgates for self-publishers, thereby increasing supply and perhaps lowering the advances and perhaps royalties that publishers are willing to pay authors?

This morning the top five Kindle bestsellers on amazon were all free. Perhaps one spot of good news, The Help by Katherine Stockett was listed at number six for $8.65, only a dollar less than the hard cover price. Does this mean that less well known authors can break into the bestseller ranks by offering their books for free? If so, they gain greater exposure and more eyeballs, but how do they get paid? Do they rely on the hope of sacrificing short-term revenue to build readership for future revenue generating books?

As an avid reader, all of this is immensely interesting to me and the speed at which technology is transforming the publishing industry is awe-inspiring.  I can't wait to see how it all shakes out. And yes, I'd love to have a job in the middle of it all.

Until then, if Jeff Bezos would like to send me a Kindle-DX to try, I'd be happy to review it here, same goes for Steve Jobs and the new Apple Tablet. Since I'm currently not working and in the midst of a job hunt, buying one isn't in the necessities column. Which means that until that product review opportunity comes along,  I'll just have to head back to the library (free) or the thrift store ($1 for paperback, $2 for hard cover) or amazon's used books ($.01 plus $3.99 for delivery, which is what I paid for Richard Russo's Empire Falls...can't for it to arrive!).

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Good News, Part One

This morning as I checked my email, I received a wonderful surprise:









Dear Suzanne Anderson,
Congratulations! Your story is published.
Have a look.


Hot Flashes and Middle Age Angst

By Suzanne Anderson
Isn’t it ironic how middle age means you start developing the voluptuous rounded belly of a fertility goddess at the very same moment you start…

SEE YOUR PUBLISHED Story NOW  


If you'd like to read the story, please click on the link above, or here.

The story is actually from a post I wrote last November based on my experience with the joys of hot flashes and what it meant to be a woman of a certain age. I submitted the article to More.com and forgot about it. Which is why today's email was such a pleasure to receive. After my post yesterday about the patience that is needed when applying for jobs and not receiving any positive feedback to my endless applications, this little bit of recognition was a very welcome surprise. (For the record, that is not me in the picture above.)

As to the mention of 'Part One' in my blog title, that's my fingers crossed optimism that more career good news is on the way.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

19 January 2010

I've moved all of the posts from this blog to my other blog: Suzanne Anderson - Table 1. The reason is twofold: I wanted to make it easier for readers, so that they would have just one place to go rather than two. From my own blogging habits, I know that I prefer to follow a writer on just one blog. Second, I found that especially now that I am working from home, that my thoughts would often overflow from one blog to another, blurring the lines between the two.

I will continue to blog about my job hunt, in fact I've just written a new post on the hunt tonight over at my other blog. And so that blog will now contain both the record of my job hunt/house purchase, as well as my new life in Evergreen, and my usual random essays on whatever piques my interest. My friend Larramie once remarked that my other blog had lost its focus or become rather random....much like my inner and outer life. That remark struck a cord and made me think what I wanted my blog to reflect. I've decided that I want it to reflect me. It will be interesting to see where that journey takes me and how it will be reflected in the shape of the blog from here.

19 January 2010

I've moved all of the posts from this blog to my other blog: Suzanne Anderson - Table 1. The reason is twofold: I wanted to make it easier for readers, so that they would have just one place to go rather than two. From my own blogging habits, I know that I prefer to follow a writer on just one blog. Second, I found that especially now that I am working from home, that my thoughts would often overflow from one blog to another, blurring the lines between the two.

I will continue to blog about my job hunt, in fact I've just written a new post on the hunt tonight over at my other blog. And so that blog will now contain both the record of my job hunt/house purchase, as well as my new life in Evergreen, and my usual random essays on whatever piques my interest. My friend Larramie once remarked that my other blog had lost its focus or become rather random....much like my inner and outer life. That remark struck a cord and made me think what I wanted my blog to reflect. I've decided that I want it to reflect me. It will be interesting to see where that journey takes me and how it will be reflected in the shape of the blog from here.

Starting a Book Club, Running a Job Hunt, and Living the Dream


As I may have mentioned in an earlier post I've decided to start a book club here in Evergreen as a means to meet new friends. Yesterday I went to meetup.com and posted my club details so that I have a means to attract new members. Now I have my very own page there for the Evergreen Vine and Book Club combining two of my favorite things, books and fine wine. I'm very excited about the club, because I love the idea of sharing a good book with other avid readers. I've never been a member of a book club and I hope that it will introduce me to a whole range of new reading horizons as well as providing the experience of how differently others may experience the same book. I hope we'll also attract some knowledgeable wine lovers so that I can also expand my wine horizons! (At the moment, my wine vocabulary consists of 'mmm that tastes good.') And the most exciting possibility will be meeting new friends in the area! I've already received my first RSVP to the first club meeting on February 2nd. By the meeting date I'd like to have around ten interested members. While I was on meetup.com, I found another local group, called the Evergreen Women and Wine Workshop Group that I've joined and will meet next week.


I start each day by sitting down at my computer and continuing the job hunt. I am getting better at it each day. I am learning not to simply apply to everything, but to focus my search and applications to jobs I'd actually love to do and which would enable me to work 'remotely'. It is discouraging that my efforts have not yet resulted in positive responses but I'm hoping that this is because its still early days and that eventually I will achieve a breakthrough. I am sending out positive thoughts and visualizations of what I want the end result to look like.Which might be the most fun part of this process. Each day I narrow the focus of what I'm looking for, what I want to create in a career, and really as a result, what I want my life to be going forward.

I am learning to treat the job hunt like a treasure hunt, to add a dimension of humor to the endeavor, that finding a job is like hunting for Easter eggs, it's just a matter of finding the one under the hibiscus bush in the far corner of the garden. (that's an allusion to a memory of my grandmother's garden in which I played as a child.) If only this process of creating a career really had the unbridled joy of child's play. Yet always, at the back of my mind is the ticking clock, the flying pages of the calendar, egging me on, making me hope that I will be able to find a job before my time here is up at the end of May. So again the question becomes, how to balance reality and joy, how to make money doing what I love? Or to put it another way, how to make doing what I love, make money?

I finished my 'work' day by getting back to work on my novel in progress. The difference between job hunting and writing? Writing feels like joy. It was absolutely wonderful to immerse myself again in the pages, to find myself thinking about the next scene as I got up to get myself a cup of tea and then hurrying back to my chair to get the ideas down on paper. It was wonderful to feel my fingers fly across the keyboard as I created a bantering dialogue between my protagonist and her mysterious boss, who may or may not be a villain. I believe this is what a career should feel like.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

A Perfect Day





Yesterday it was sunny and a balmy 50 degrees here. So we ventured outside and spent the afternoon sitting out on the deck and reading with a cup of tea by our side. What could be better than that? A perfect day, indeed.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

14 January 2010

I've spent this morning as well as yesterday actively pursuing job leads, applying for jobs directly as well as signing up with various job search agents. Actually today was the most productive day on that front that I've had since I've been here, which is a positive. Remarkably, I actually found and applied to jobs I would really enjoy doing. And then this evening I spent time on my novel in progress. Both of these things felt good.

I've been in Colorado for six weeks and time is flying faster than I imagined. For instance when I signed in today to write a new post on the job hunt project I was amazed to see that it has been a week since my last post, it seems that it was only days. There is so much I want to accomplish, so much I need to accomplish before the end of May. My greatest concern is that I obtain a career before my six months lease here is up. Whether I do or not may determine whether I can or should stay here or move on.

14 January 2010

I've spent this morning as well as yesterday actively pursuing job leads, applying for jobs directly as well as signing up with various job search agents. Actually today was the most productive day on that front that I've had since I've been here, which is a positive. Remarkably, I actually found and applied to jobs I would really enjoy doing. And then this evening I spent time on my novel in progress. Both of these things felt good.

I've been in Colorado for six weeks and time is flying faster than I imagined. For instance when I signed in today to write a new post on the job hunt project I was amazed to see that it has been a week since my last post, it seems that it was only days. There is so much I want to accomplish, so much I need to accomplish before the end of May. My greatest concern is that I obtain a career before my six months lease here is up. Whether I do or not may determine whether I can or should stay here or move on.

14 January 2010

I've spent this morning as well as yesterday actively pursuing job leads, applying for jobs directly as well as signing up with various job search agents. Actually today was the most productive day on that front that I've had since I've been here, which is a positive. Remarkably, I actually found and applied to jobs I would really enjoy doing. And then this evening I spent time on my novel in progress. Both of these things felt good.

I've been in Colorado for six weeks and time is flying faster than I imagined. For instance when I signed in today to write a new post on the job hunt project I was amazed to see that it has been a week since my last post, it seems that it was only days. There is so much I want to accomplish, so much I need to accomplish before the end of May. My greatest concern is that I obtain a career before my six months lease here is up. Whether I do or not may determine whether I can or should stay here or move on.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Chloe




This morning my first and most precious dog, Chloe, passed away after a series of strokes she suffered over the past two days. Chloe was fourteen years old. I got her when she was eight weeks old when I went to a Yorkshire terrier breeder to buy a dog. I'd picked out one puppy that I'd intended to name Cleo and I was sure she was the one I wanted, she was the prettiest of the group. And then I picked up Chloe and when I held her up to my face, she kissed me on the nose. And that was that. She chose me.

And demanded that I change her name.

Chloe has been a world traveler. She drove cross country with me twice, first to Lake Tahoe from Florida, then back to Florida from Seattle. Oh she loved car trips...except that she always demanded to sit up front with the big people. And she loved to fly (though again she demanded that she not ride in her carrier beneath the seat, but in my lap, which more than once got me into serious trouble with the flight crew...Air France take note, Chloe, Suzanne and white wine...), she went with me to Kiev, Ukraine, and then to Baku, Azerbaijan. She's flown first class from Paris to Fort Lauderdale (ahem, beneath the covers of my reclined chair much to the consternation of a not dog friendly flight attendant...oh the French!), walked along the edge of the Grand Canyon, and survived an attack by a German Shepard at a dog show in Kiev.

She is the wisest, smartest, most beautiful dog, I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. Her beautiful coat would make the Housewives of Orange County cry with envy. And her stunning brown eyes never needed any enhancement to get their message across. She would bark to get your attention and continued to give kisses on the nose until the very end. When we were at the hospital and she didn't give a kiss when asked, I understood the doctor's assessment that Chloe was no longer coherent.

Chloe had a wisdom and compassion that first showed itself when her younger brother, Cosmo a rolly-polly yorkie who was the one no one wanted of a later litter from the same breeder, passed away when we were in Baku. At that time, Chloe always slept with me and Cosmo slept with my mother. After Cosmo passed away, Chloe went to Mom's room and slept there to keep her company. After Mom's heart attack, Chloe became Mom's dog and followed her everywhere. When I adopted Coco, another yorkie, this time a young rascal from a disruptive home, Chloe never doubted her alpha position in the family and like a grand dame, welcomed the young upstart.

Chloe's decline was a surprise, but not a surprise given how old she was and her health issues. The surprise was how quickly it happened. When we took Chloe to Evergreen Animal Hospital yesterday afternoon, we met Dr. Tim Ruggles who was incredibly informative and patient with us while we tried to figure out what to do. We did some blood tests which revealed elevated red and white blood cell counts, but really it was a neurological problem, due to either a stroke or a brain tumor and it was clear that Chloe would not regain the use of her legs. Tim gave us our options, including to let her spend the night at the hospital, and when we decided to bring Chloe home he gave us valium for her so she would be comfortable.  When we were at the hospital, Chloe briefly rallied and I thought she was going to be okay. However, by the time we got her home, it was clear that it was just a matter of hours.

My words are inadequate to describe how much I love Chloe, or how much she added to my life. Last night after we brought her home from the hospital, we put her in her bed to rest. At one point I went outside and prayed to Dad that he would welcome Chloe in Heaven when she arrived. The rest of the evening, Mom and I took turns holding Chloe in our laps as she lay in her bed. Later, I was blessed to be able to say good-night to Chloe, to pet her as she closed her eyes and went to sleep.

Good night, Chloe. I love you.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

7 January 2010



I have to admit that I was terribly bored today. I started off with the best of intentions. I got up, ate a quick breakfast and sat down at my computer to begin my job hunt. I did in fact apply to two or three jobs, perhaps only one of which I'd actually enjoy. And then I got up and went outside to shovel the driveway of the snow that had fallen overnight. It was a stunningly beautiful day here in Evergreen. Yes, cold as can be, but a baby blue sky devoid of a single cloud, the blue spruce lining my driveway were  dusted with snow, as were the surrounding mountains. See what I mean?

And yet, as I worked away with my shovel (I'd been unable to get the snowblower to start) the only thing I could think of was: I'm bored. In fact, I was so desperately bored that I started praying: 'Dear God, I want to be productive. I believe that you've given me talents and a purpose. Help me to figure out how to put those to productive and profitable use so I can be financially independent and a productive member of society. Amen." Or something along those lines, perhaps not quite so eloquent...I tend to ramble when I pray. But I'd hoped that the repetitive, meditative physicality of shoveling would open my mind to inspiration.

By the end of the driveway the only definitive idea I'd come up with was that I'd like to start a monthly book club as a means to meet people in the community. When I came in from shoveling, I sent my real estate agent an email and told her about the book club idea and asked her if she knew anyone who'd like to join. (I'm torn between wanting to read 'The Help' or cozy mysteries or biographies or women's fiction, see...decisive. not.)

My problem is that I don't know what I want to do for a career. Oh, I can tell you what I don't want: I don't want a corporate job that requires me to wear pantyhose, a business suit, a corporate structure reporting to a boss that I may or may not like, the prison of a set salary with yearly increases determined not by my efforts but by some predetermined percentage. I don't want to work in sales, I hate cold calling. I've done that, and had enough of it. Although to be fair, there is a comforting security in receiving a known monthly salary that can be counted on to pay the bills, the fun of working with others in the group. On the other hand, having worked in commercial real estate for the past three years I know the freedom of making my own hours, but also the insecurity of going months without income while I waited for a deal to close, or to have a deal fall through at the eleventh hour.

But ask me what I want to do and I'm large on generalizations and short on specifics. Last night I was working on Chapter 7 of The Pathfinder (my favorite career finding book so far). In Chapter 7 I was instructed to compile a list of my career 'wants'. Here's the list of my Top 5:

I want to be financially secure and independent, creating automatic sources of income.
I want to work for myself.
I want to work from home, but have an active social life.
I want to be fearless and confident about who I am and what I do for a career.
I want to discover and utilize my natural talents and passions in my workday.
I want to learn how to make money, invest and grow my income.
I want to be successful in my field.
I want to inspire and influence people through my writing.
I want to be able to work from anywhere in the world.

Okay, that was more than five, but you get the idea.

I have a deep longing in my heart to create a career that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning, that makes me feel productive, in the flow, with a knowing that I am doing exactly what I was born to do. The problem is that I have no idea of what that is. And so I pray and I write this daily blog of the journey. And now I need to discover another way to move forward, closer to that goal because what I felt today was not boredom it was a growing desperation to make progress.

7 January 2010



I have to admit that I was terribly bored today. I started off with the best of intentions. I got up, ate a quick breakfast and sat down at my computer to begin my job hunt. I did in fact apply to two or three jobs, perhaps only one of which I'd actually enjoy. And then I got up and went outside to shovel the driveway of the snow that had fallen overnight. It was a stunningly beautiful day here in Evergreen. Yes, cold as can be, but a baby blue sky devoid of a single cloud, the blue spruce lining my driveway were  dusted with snow, as were the surrounding mountains. See what I mean?

And yet, as I worked away with my shovel (I'd been unable to get the snowblower to start) the only thing I could think of was: I'm bored. In fact, I was so desperately bored that I started praying: 'Dear God, I want to be productive. I believe that you've given me talents and a purpose. Help me to figure out how to put those to productive and profitable use so I can be financially independent and a productive member of society. Amen." Or something along those lines, perhaps not quite so eloquent...I tend to ramble when I pray. But I'd hoped that the repetitive, meditative physicality of shoveling would open my mind to inspiration.

By the end of the driveway the only definitive idea I'd come up with was that I'd like to start a monthly book club as a means to meet people in the community. When I came in from shoveling, I sent my real estate agent an email and told her about the book club idea and asked her if she knew anyone who'd like to join. (I'm torn between wanting to read 'The Help' or cozy mysteries or biographies or women's fiction, see...decisive. not.)

My problem is that I don't know what I want to do for a career. Oh, I can tell you what I don't want: I don't want a corporate job that requires me to wear pantyhose, a business suit, a corporate structure reporting to a boss that I may or may not like, the prison of a set salary with yearly increases determined not by my efforts but by some predetermined percentage. I don't want to work in sales, I hate cold calling. I've done that, and had enough of it. Although to be fair, there is a comforting security in receiving a known monthly salary that can be counted on to pay the bills, the fun of working with others in the group. On the other hand, having worked in commercial real estate for the past three years I know the freedom of making my own hours, but also the insecurity of going months without income while I waited for a deal to close, or to have a deal fall through at the eleventh hour.

But ask me what I want to do and I'm large on generalizations and short on specifics. Last night I was working on Chapter 7 of The Pathfinder (my favorite career finding book so far). In Chapter 7 I was instructed to compile a list of my career 'wants'. Here's the list of my Top 5:

I want to be financially secure and independent, creating automatic sources of income.
I want to work for myself.
I want to work from home, but have an active social life.
I want to be fearless and confident about who I am and what I do for a career.
I want to discover and utilize my natural talents and passions in my workday.
I want to learn how to make money, invest and grow my income.
I want to be successful in my field.
I want to inspire and influence people through my writing.
I want to be able to work from anywhere in the world.

Okay, that was more than five, but you get the idea.

I have a deep longing in my heart to create a career that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning, that makes me feel productive, in the flow, with a knowing that I am doing exactly what I was born to do. The problem is that I have no idea of what that is. And so I pray and I write this daily blog of the journey. And now I need to discover another way to move forward, closer to that goal because what I felt today was not boredom it was a growing desperation to make progress.

Birdwatching

 A week or so ago I tried a little experiment. I bought a little bell-shaped bird feeder made of seeds. Since I'd moved into the Swedish farmhouse, I'd noticed little chickadees outside my kitchen window. Now I wanted to see if I could attract their attention with food, and the low start up cost of the seed-bell was the perfect way to begin. Well, needless to say, the little Mountain Chickadees came and within days the seed-bell was gone.




So I decided to up the ante, enlarge my commitment, so to speak. I bought a wire box that holds millet.And that brought out the Stellar Jays.



I decided to go all in. If you read my ill-fated stock trading story yesterday, you'll know I'm just that kinda girl. So I bought an adorable cedar-sided birdfeeder shaped like a little cabin. Suitable architecture for a home in the mountains.



And my investment was rewarded with even more beautiful visitors, like this Northern Flicker!




 Every day brings more happy customers to the irresistable 24/7 buffet. They get fed and I get joy.





I'd say that's a pretty good trade.

7 January 2010


I have to admit that I was terribly bored today. I started off with the best of intentions. I got up, ate a quick breakfast and sat down at my computer to begin my job hunt. I did in fact apply to two or three jobs, perhaps only one of which I'd actually enjoy. And then I got up and went outside to shovel the driveway of the snow that had fallen overnight. It was a stunningly beautiful day here in Evergreen. Yes, cold as can be, but a baby blue sky devoid of a single cloud, the blue spruce lining my driveway were  dusted with snow, as were the surrounding mountains. See what I mean?

And yet, as I worked away with my shovel (I'd been unable to get the snowblower to start) the only thing I could think of was: I'm bored. In fact, I was so desperately bored that I started praying: 'Dear God, I want to be productive. I believe that you've given me talents and a purpose. Help me to figure out how to put those to productive and profitable use so I can be financially independent and a productive member of society. Amen." Or something along those lines, perhaps not quite so eloquent...I tend to ramble when I pray. But I'd hoped that the repetitive, meditative physicality of shoveling would open my mind to inspiration.

By the end of the driveway the only definitive idea I'd come up with was that I'd like to start a monthly book club as a means to meet people in the community. When I came in from shoveling, I sent my real estate agent an email and told her about the book club idea and asked her if she knew anyone who'd like to join. (I'm torn between wanting to read 'The Help' or cozy mysteries or biographies or women's fiction, see...decisive. not.)

My problem is that I don't know what I want to do for a career. Oh, I can tell you what I don't want: I don't want a corporate job that requires me to wear pantyhose, a business suit, a corporate structure reporting to a boss that I may or may not like, the prison of a set salary with yearly increases determined not by my efforts but by some predetermined percentage. I don't want to work in sales, I hate cold calling. I've done that, and had enough of it. Although to be fair, there is a comforting security in receiving a known monthly salary that can be counted on to pay the bills, the fun of working with others in the group. On the other hand, having worked in commercial real estate for the past three years I know the freedom of making my own hours, but also the insecurity of going months without income while I waited for a deal to close, or to have a deal fall through at the eleventh hour.

But ask me what I want to do and I'm large on generalizations and short on specifics. Last night I was working on Chapter 7 of The Pathfinder (my favorite career finding book so far). In Chapter 7 I was instructed to compile a list of my career 'wants'. Here's the list of my Top 5:

I want to be financially secure and independent, creating automatic sources of income.
I want to work for myself.
I want to work from home, but have an active social life.
I want to be fearless and confident about who I am and what I do for a career.
I want to discover and utilize my natural talents and passions in my workday.
I want to learn how to make money, invest and grow my income.
I want to be successful in my field.
I want to inspire and influence people through my writing.
I want to be able to work from anywhere in the world.

Okay, that was more than five, but you get the idea.

I have a deep longing in my heart to create a career that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning, that makes me feel productive, in the flow, with a knowing that I am doing exactly what I was born to do. The problem is that I have no idea of what that is. And so I pray and I write this daily blog of the journey. And now I need to discover another way to move forward, closer to that goal because what I felt today was not boredom it was a growing desperation to make progress.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Closing Doors



Yesterday I received a stock pick via email. The simple recommendation sent me into a blue funk for the rest of the evening as it was a reminder of a bad stock pick I made last year. Instead of choosing x, I chose y. Instead of making money on the investment, I lost money. The memory of this decision bothered me so much that I actually spent the evening calculating how much money this bad investment cost me compared to how much I would have made if I'd chosen the other stock. Reliving the event was all the more painful because at the moment I am unemployed and living off of my savings, which means that had I made the correct choice, I would have made enough money to literally pay for this year.

This thought was compounded by my recent sad experience with Joyce Van Lines, the moving company that brought my belongings to Colorado. Despite my careful research and choice of an A rated company, I ended up with a moving experience that cost more than double what I'd originally estimated. The anxiety I felt over this, the arguments I had with the moving company, cost me two weeks of sleepless nights before Christmas.

And finally there was a disappointing weekend when my current weight issues, my age, my insecurities about my accomplishments and current standing in life all came to a head and left me wondering just where I was going and what I was doing. Not a great a December.

But what I have been trying to remind myself for the past day is that all of that is now behind me. With the start of the New Year, I have a choice, I can continue to dwell on these incidents and carry the sadness of their recollection with me as I move forward. Or I can learn from each event, and choose to close the door, put those events behind me and move forward a bit wiser, and with an optimistic outlook for the future. I won't pretend it's easy to let go of these unfortunate events, I tend to be one who ruminates. But I also realize that if I am to make progress this year, I have to close the door on the past year and look forward.

6 January 10


Today I'm trying to get into more of a routine. Get up at a reasonable hour (7am versus 10am) and then spend the first three hours of the day on the job hunt, sending out resumes, responding to new job listings, etc. Next I work in specific blocks of time for the other projects I'm working on: reacquainting myself with my novel, working on the exercises in The Pathfinder, writing a blog post here, tweeting on twitter, visiting other blogs. The impetus is that hopefully some semblance of structure will help me to track my progress and not let time simply fly by with aimless hours of web surfing or God forbid news junking. (It feels like that's what happened in December, though I know it was much more dramatic and activity filled than that.) And most of all some structure will lead to progress and keep the hounds of fear and self-loathing at bay.

6 January 10


Today I'm trying to get into more of a routine. Get up at a reasonable hour (7am versus 10am) and then spend the first three hours of the day on the job hunt, sending out resumes, responding to new job listings, etc. Next I work in specific blocks of time for the other projects I'm working on: reacquainting myself with my novel, working on the exercises in The Pathfinder, writing a blog post here, tweeting on twitter, visiting other blogs. The impetus is that hopefully some semblance of structure will help me to track my progress and not let time simply fly by with aimless hours of web surfing or God forbid news junking. (It feels like that's what happened in December, though I know it was much more dramatic and activity filled than that.) And most of all some structure will lead to progress and keep the hounds of fear and self-loathing at bay.

6 January 10



Today I'm trying to get into more of a routine. Get up at a reasonable hour (7am versus 10am) and then spend the first three hours of the day on the job hunt, sending out resumes, responding to new job listings, etc. Next I work in specific blocks of time for the other projects I'm working on: reacquainting myself with my novel, working on the exercises in The Pathfinder, writing a blog post here, tweeting on twitter, visiting other blogs. The impetus is that hopefully some semblance of structure will help me to track my progress and not let time simply fly by with aimless hours of web surfing or God forbid news junking. (It feels like that's what happened in December, though I know it was much more dramatic and activity filled than that.) And most of all some structure will lead to progress and keep the hounds of fear and self-loathing at bay.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

5 January 10




This afternoon, after creating a new post over at my other blog: A View From Table One, I tried a little experiment. I imported all the posts from this blog over there. I've actually been toying with this idea for a few weeks.

When I first created this blog a year ago, it was to record my journey towards a special end, the move out west. With the beginning of the New Year, I decided that I would continue the blog as a means to record the next step of my journey which is the search for a meaningful (and profitable) career. My other blog became a weekly forum of articles for whatever was on my mind at the moment, generally my view on something political, cultural, or personal.

For the first year, this separation worked and kept me focused on the task at hand. Now however, I find that I am referring readers to one blog or the other, which may or may not be convenient for them. From my own reading habits, even if I know that a blogger has two sites, I will generally stick to reading one site over the other unless I have an abundance of time. Which is what led me today to use blogger's very simply export/import function to import all of the blog posts from this blog to my original blog.

Now, tell me what you think: Do you manage more than one blog? Does it make sense to maintain two blogs or does one do the job? As a blog reader, do you follow a blogger's multiple sites?

5 January 10




This afternoon, after creating a new post over at my other blog: A View From Table One, I tried a little experiment. I imported all the posts from this blog over there. I've actually been toying with this idea for a few weeks.

When I first created this blog a year ago, it was to record my journey towards a special end, the move out west. With the beginning of the New Year, I decided that I would continue the blog as a means to record the next step of my journey which is the search for a meaningful (and profitable) career. My other blog became a weekly forum of articles for whatever was on my mind at the moment, generally my view on something political, cultural, or personal.

For the first year, this separation worked and kept me focused on the task at hand. Now however, I find that I am referring readers to one blog or the other, which may or may not be convenient for them. From my own reading habits, even if I know that a blogger has two sites, I will generally stick to reading one site over the other unless I have an abundance of time. Which is what led me today to use blogger's very simply export/import function to import all of the blog posts from this blog to my original blog.

Now, tell me what you think: Do you manage more than one blog? Does it make sense to maintain two blogs or does one do the job? As a blog reader, do you follow a blogger's multiple sites?

The World Outside My Window


From my living room window is one of the most picturesque views of Mt. Evans. On the first morning after my arrival I woke up at 6 am and wandered downstairs, still feeling disoriented and in shock from the two hour trip from the airport in freezing weather and quite honestly wondering what I'd gotten myself into.

That morning, December 3rd, I wandered over to the large Palladian window that divides the great room into living and dining spaces and stared out at the two acres of fields that make up the back yard and then up and outward toward the view of the mountains. The light of the early morning sky was a luminescent silver which made the snow on the mountains glow eerily. It was a disconcerting beauty.

Since then, I've learned to watch the mountain as a harbinger of the weather. On clear days I can see all the way to the summit. As storms move in, its highest peaks are the first to become shrouded in snow and then its just a matter of time before the summit disappears altogether.

Having that faraway vista has has become a source of pleasure and comfort, a monumental sundial that tells me the time. When I am working at my computer and lose track of the hours, it is the long shadows, the glow of the sun as it paints the clouds with hues of orange and pink before slipping beneath the edge of the mountains, that tells me my day is through.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

3 January 10

This afternoon I was checking out the bestsellers list on amazon.com and was surprised to see The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin ranked at #21! I was familiar with The Happiness Project via Gretchen's blog of the same name, which she started while she was writing the book and to create an ongoing online project not only to promote the book but also to raise awareness about the project.
This reminded me of the recent stellar success of The Pioneer Woman Cooks, a cookbook by the very popular The PioneerWoman blog, Ree Drummond, whose cookbook recently hit #3 on the New York Times bestsellers list. I remember when I first started reading her blog two years ago.


What do these two women have in common? Brilliant success? Yes. But the more profound and daunting lesson for me is that each woman started a project, completed it, and found success in attaining their goal.


As I've been working my way through The Pathfinder, a book on discovering and creating your right career, I've come face to face with the fact that one of my greatest fears is that I will fail, even if I try, even if I complete all the necessary steps, in the end my effort will fall short and I will be no further along the path of success than I am now. So my overwhelming fear of failure, or of failing again at something I care about, is the greatest obstacle I face going forward.
The other painful admission is that both of these women have accomplished something that I have long tried and failed at, which is to become a published author. Quite honestly, I'm not sure if I have the writing talent to ever make that dream a reality, which makes it all the more bittersweet because books are a deep love of mine and there is no career in the world that would bring me greater joy than to be an author. Yet, despite my best efforts over the past 10 years, I have never managed to bring that dream to fruition. I've completed 2 1/2 novels. The half finished novel I last touched a year ago. Today I opened up those files and compiled them into one document. My goal this year is to finish that novel. Quite honestly, I'm not sure that it's good enough to ever be published but I want to see it through to the end and then start another one. The point is that whether I am ever published or not, I will complete this project.

Success is something I have experienced in life, just not recently. Completing this book, finding the right career for this next phase in my life are two important goals for this year. So is buying a house, which will follow from attaining the right career. I am hungry for success and for being in the flow of my life again.

3 January 10

This afternoon I was checking out the bestsellers list on amazon.com and was surprised to see The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin ranked at #21! I was familiar with The Happiness Project via Gretchen's blog of the same name, which she started while she was writing the book and to create an ongoing online project not only to promote the book but also to raise awareness about the project.
This reminded me of the recent stellar success of The Pioneer Woman Cooks, a cookbook by the very popular The PioneerWoman blog, Ree Drummond, whose cookbook recently hit #3 on the New York Times bestsellers list. I remember when I first started reading her blog two years ago.


What do these two women have in common? Brilliant success? Yes. But the more profound and daunting lesson for me is that each woman started a project, completed it, and found success in attaining their goal.


As I've been working my way through The Pathfinder, a book on discovering and creating your right career, I've come face to face with the fact that one of my greatest fears is that I will fail, even if I try, even if I complete all the necessary steps, in the end my effort will fall short and I will be no further along the path of success than I am now. So my overwhelming fear of failure, or of failing again at something I care about, is the greatest obstacle I face going forward.
The other painful admission is that both of these women have accomplished something that I have long tried and failed at, which is to become a published author. Quite honestly, I'm not sure if I have the writing talent to ever make that dream a reality, which makes it all the more bittersweet because books are a deep love of mine and there is no career in the world that would bring me greater joy than to be an author. Yet, despite my best efforts over the past 10 years, I have never managed to bring that dream to fruition. I've completed 2 1/2 novels. The half finished novel I last touched a year ago. Today I opened up those files and compiled them into one document. My goal this year is to finish that novel. Quite honestly, I'm not sure that it's good enough to ever be published but I want to see it through to the end and then start another one. The point is that whether I am ever published or not, I will complete this project.

Success is something I have experienced in life, just not recently. Completing this book, finding the right career for this next phase in my life are two important goals for this year. So is buying a house, which will follow from attaining the right career. I am hungry for success and for being in the flow of my life again.

3 January 10

This afternoon I was checking out the bestsellers list on amazon.com and was surprised to see The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin ranked at #21! I was familiar with The Happiness Project via Gretchen's blog of the same name, which she started while she was writing the book and to create an ongoing online project not only to promote the book but also to raise awareness about the project.
This reminded me of the recent stellar success of The Pioneer Woman Cooks, a cookbook by the very popular The PioneerWoman blog, Ree Drummond, whose cookbook recently hit #3 on the New York Times bestsellers list. I remember when I first started reading her blog two years ago.


What do these two women have in common? Brilliant success? Yes. But the more profound and daunting lesson for me is that each woman started a project, completed it, and found success in attaining their goal.


As I've been working my way through The Pathfinder, a book on discovering and creating your right career, I've come face to face with the fact that one of my greatest fears is that I will fail, even if I try, even if I complete all the necessary steps, in the end my effort will fall short and I will be no further along the path of success than I am now. So my overwhelming fear of failure, or of failing again at something I care about, is the greatest obstacle I face going forward.
The other painful admission is that both of these women have accomplished something that I have long tried and failed at, which is to become a published author. Quite honestly, I'm not sure if I have the writing talent to ever make that dream a reality, which makes it all the more bittersweet because books are a deep love of mine and there is no career in the world that would bring me greater joy than to be an author. Yet, despite my best efforts over the past 10 years, I have never managed to bring that dream to fruition. I've completed 2 1/2 novels. The half finished novel I last touched a year ago. Today I opened up those files and compiled them into one document. My goal this year is to finish that novel. Quite honestly, I'm not sure that it's good enough to ever be published but I want to see it through to the end and then start another one. The point is that whether I am ever published or not, I will complete this project.

Success is something I have experienced in life, just not recently. Completing this book, finding the right career for this next phase in my life are two important goals for this year. So is buying a house, which will follow from attaining the right career. I am hungry for success and for being in the flow of my life again.

Friday, January 1, 2010

1 Jan 09

Last year at this time I started this blog as a means to focus my attention on a long held dream to move out west. It took me nearly a year, but by December I had moved to Evergreen, Colorado.Whether this will ultimately be my new hometown remains to be seen and depends on a number of factors including my ability to find or create a career in the area.

While I've taken the first step in realizing the dream that created this blog last year, I still have a long way to go. Which is why I will continue to use this blog to record the next step in my journey, creating a career that inspires me as seminal endeavors in my past have done. As I mentioned in my New Year's post on A View From Table One, the happiest people I know share one thing in common, they LOVE what they do for a living. In my own life, I can site two similar instances when I was in the 'flow' of life and doing what I was meant to do at that moment: when I was a young competitive swimmer, and later, in my early twenties and first went to work on Wall Street.

So this year, my touchstone is CAREER, and my intention is to create a career that utilizes my natural talents and passions, whose pursuit brings me the joy that I've felt in the past. My first step has been reading The Pathfinder, by Nicholas Lore, the founder of the Rockport Institute, one of the foremost career advising firms in the country. I'm also applying to jobs that speak to my heart rather than my business brain. While I don't yet have an actual picture in my mind of what my perfect career will be, I have instead an impression that currently is nothing more than a feeling of me at my best, happy, excited, and brave enough to try out a few dreams. And that feels good. Now I just have to figure out how to bring that to fruition....and get paid for it!

1 Jan 09

Last year at this time I started this blog as a means to focus my attention on a long held dream to move out west. It took me nearly a year, but by December I had moved to Evergreen, Colorado.Whether this will ultimately be my new hometown remains to be seen and depends on a number of factors including my ability to find or create a career in the area.

While I've taken the first step in realizing the dream that created this blog last year, I still have a long way to go. Which is why I will continue to use this blog to record the next step in my journey, creating a career that inspires me as seminal endeavors in my past have done. As I mentioned in my New Year's post on A View From Table One, the happiest people I know share one thing in common, they LOVE what they do for a living. In my own life, I can site two similar instances when I was in the 'flow' of life and doing what I was meant to do at that moment: when I was a young competitive swimmer, and later, in my early twenties and first went to work on Wall Street.

So this year, my touchstone is CAREER, and my intention is to create a career that utilizes my natural talents and passions, whose pursuit brings me the joy that I've felt in the past. My first step has been reading The Pathfinder, by Nicholas Lore, the founder of the Rockport Institute, one of the foremost career advising firms in the country. I'm also applying to jobs that speak to my heart rather than my business brain. While I don't yet have an actual picture in my mind of what my perfect career will be, I have instead an impression that currently is nothing more than a feeling of me at my best, happy, excited, and brave enough to try out a few dreams. And that feels good. Now I just have to figure out how to bring that to fruition....and get paid for it!